more catching up…

OK – what else happened? i am trying to get it all down, …so that i can prioritise what to focus on, NEXT. i’m a bit scattered mentally, at present.

should have paid the rent last thursday, but found out i was overdrawn at the bank - first time ever in my life, because i am usually so scrupulously careful about such things.  it cost me $60 in fees - OUCH! – but could have been worse. sorted out a short term solution.

received email from ghastly new york employer, firing me, and telling me that he would TRY to pay me what he owes me, “within a month”: don’t have a lot of faith that i will receive anything – but need it. i did some online research for him, but he was a very poor communicator, and clearly has an anger management problem!

received a book, to review, today – from DANCE BOOKS in alton (UK). very impressed because the post only took 3 days, and its only 5 days since the request was put in, via the magazine that i write for. must thank dance books, personally, even before i read it. THAT’s something to be grateful for. 

bills, bills, bills,… climbing my way through the pile.

got some new online work – potentially -in online medical ‘research’: as in, information gathering. keen to give it a try, but not sure about the tax situation: must give thought to this. otherwise, may NOT be financially advantageous.

choreographing a couple of ballet solos at present, and finding it comes quite easily: feel very pleased, after all these years, that my many years of accumulated experience and skills development has reached a point where i can see that i have a facility, in an area that i care about, and have always had high regard for (choreography).

went to west australian ballet’s ‘coppelia’ last week, and enjoyed it. fortunately didn’t have to review. it’s looking a bit passe now (forgive me for not remembering how to do an accented e) – but was still very enjoyable, and fabulously performed. also, there were improvements, notably in the lighting. encouraged my students and their families to see it : they enjoyed it too.

enjoyed meeting a couple of the dancers afterwards, who i felt might be willing to be email correspondents in future – anonymous or otherwise, when it comes to print credit/blame – with regard to my reporting of company management issues. this was pleasing because, having been a dancer myself, i know how critics are perceived by dancers (BADLY!) and was surprised at these particular young dancers’ politeness, straightforwardness, and – apparently – willingness to be in touch. time will tell whether they follow through, but it was promising.

what else? received some money from my dad! – he had a small lottery win, and wanted to share it: how kind. must phone him and thank him. he can’t be bothered with online correspondence, so won’t see this expression of gratitude. although i need to spend the money on the rent, i feel i want to buy something which uniquely represents his gift, so must think on that. maybe a new mobile phone: sick of being annoyed by the one i own at present.

called the RSPCA to dob in an old friend – now a drug dealer – whose very old (and HUGE) dog was injured in a dogfight last week, but who hasn’t taken the dog to a vet, because she supposedly “has no money”: as always. RSPCA thankfully followed through (rare!) and dog is now at the vets, with drips and antibiotics and sedatives for the abscesses on its head. 

the owner?: bumped into her at the supermarket on saturday evening: she immediately challenged me: “did YOU call the RSPCA?” i looked her straight in the eyes and said ‘no’. 

 she says vet won’t release the dog after treatment, until $700 bill is paid in full : i would like to help her out with bill, but don’t think i can find anything to spare at present. DON’T feel ‘guilty’ or responsible for her bill – just know that it’s a lot of money for her to find, so would like to help. animals can cost a lot: it’s scary when you love them and aren’t financially well off.

gotta go, in a minute: kid coming for private (ballet) lesson. still haven’t had lunch (it’s 3.30pm). still haven’t remembered all the things that took up my attention in the past week, and contributed to my present scattered mind state…must EAT. more later.

catching up…

friends, friends, friends – how lovely it is to see your red dot locations on the world map, and to feel ‘heard’! 

~ exciting. ~ and 199 hits – that’s nice, too. 

i have had an eventful week, such that i have not posted, nor have i even had time to READ the blogs that *I* like to read. so i will have to try to catch up with that, today.

what happened?
hmm, not sure i can remember! – maybe i will have to work backwards…
yesterday i have to confess that i slept all day, after not getting much sleep the night before, and also feeling a bit overwhelmed by things on my mind. NOT depressed – just in a whirlpool…

saturday night, my housemates and i went to the nightclub, got home at 3 am, after an ‘OK/average/NOT especially fun’ night.

as soon as i got home, the phone rang: police. they had a young girl there, who is a friend of mine – i love her! – and she had called the police because her mum was drunk -and who knows WHY else- …. she’s 11. beyond that, i don’t know what happened, because when i asked her in the morning if she wanted to talk about what happened, she said “not really”. so, i left it at that.

the police asked if she could stay with me overnight, and of course i said ‘yes’. so they dropped her here, and we went to bed: me, the BIG dog and her, in one double bed (the dog in the middle). mercifully, she slept all night, because some of my housemates were a little ‘the worse for wear’ and became somewhat ‘emotional’, as they say, in the kitchen…could have done without THAT!

first thing in the morning: the police phone, and tell me to take her home. i wake her up and she doesn’t want to go. scared that “mum won’t be sober yet” - HER words. police tell me to take her home anyway, and that, if things aren’t right, she should return to me, and I should call them.

I take her home. before we leave, she says “my heart is thumping”. when we arrive, mum takes her inside without noticing me/I’m standing off to the side. i wait and listen as the mother launches into an abusive swearing tirade against the child – for me “being late bringing her home”, for the child calling the police, …a lot of it, i can’t hear all the words - but i can hear the tone and the swearing.

i wait, but the mother is between the child and the door. the child accepts it meekly – occasionally responding quietly and politely. i accept that all i can do is go away, go home, and wait for her to come over to me. (i live just around the corner.)…

i go home and go back to bed, not having had much sleep. the child doesn’t come. every time i hear a noise, i almost jump out of bed to welcome her. she doesn’t come. by nightfall i am feeling sad and lonely for missing her and wondering how she is, and what is happening for her at home.

i sleep, but i have had too much sleep by now, and have bad dreams. then it’s TODAY!

today, i take some action. can’t say more. will erase this post in a couple of days so that there is no chance of the mother seeing it.

saturday: housecleaning, couple of hours work, had a coffee, got drawn into a long discussion with coffee-shop owner about HER situation: apparently she has been coming to work from the women’s refuge for 5 weeks, after her husband threatened her life, stopped working, demanded maintenance from her, and took her kids. she is a very recent immigrant to australia, therefore isolated from all her previous family and friends/social support system. during this period, her mother in the UK developed cancer, and her young daughter (who has had leakemia) got bullied at school about being overweight (caused by her steroid medication)  – to the point where they had to find a new school for her. her shop manager quit – by text message! - while she was visiting the UK (to see her sick mother). she is now ready to move from the refuge, into her own accommodation, and has legally got back ACCESS to her kids – but not custody. she says she has learned so much about herself…she has deeper concerns for the children’s welfare, but this is enough to write about.

obviously i am concerned for her, and would like to help – will consider how i can do that, because financially i’m not in the best position at the moment.

had a foster child – 8 year old boy – for thursday and friday – the nicest and the easiest child i have had – despite the fact that the reason i had him, was because he was suspended from school, because he beat up a female classmate to the point where she had to go to hospital, the day before. WHY?  – because she embarrasses him, by telling people she LOVES him… jeez it’s a tough world out there, today.

still, he was quite delightful, and a pleasure to get to know.

wednesday i found out that i haven’t got – or even been considered for – the job i wanted and thought i might get. also, 2 hours later, found that i MIGHT have another job, which i’m not sure about: a prospect which is both exciting and intimidating at the same time.

also, found out that one of my housemates has an assault conviction, and therefore his presence in my home is a stumbling block to further foster care, and i will probably have to ask him to go… that’s OK. can do. but he is off-work with an injury at the moment, and worried about money, so this news will not be welcome, in the context of other current challenges to his lifestyle and wellbeing. i will wait till i know for sure about that situation. have asked for clarification (re his police clearance, or lack of same) from foster care people, today.

have to finish the obituary for one of the funerals i went to last week – went to 2 funerals in the space of 3 days: wierd! both ‘good’ funerals. that’s enough on that subject.

sun is shining today, even though it was an unusually cold night: 4 degrees – it never gets colder than that, here where i live. today it will be 21 degrees and sunny – and it looks lovely outside.  have to go chop some stuff in the garden, so that it will be collected in the council ‘green waste’ pick up, any day now. at least today is a good day for it – but i have so much else to do.

better go have lunch – more later!